It started when she first walked in the door - I said hello, and she said "Do you guys have almond milk?"
She was about 100 pounds soaking wet, and her skin was that burnt-cookie color that tends to only be associated with insecure, self-absorbed young adults and chameleons blending into the bark of a tree. Dressed in pristine, ankle-high heeled boots, a pre-torn denim skirt with a studded belt, and a black tank, you would've thought that she had stopped in to caffienate before going to a dance club complete with martinis and overly paid athletes. The problem is it was 5 o'clock on a Tuesday night - in Michigan.
After correcting her assumption that no, the title of "dark chocolate" does not in any way imply that it's vegan, she decided to go with a Black Thai Tea Latte, complete with an absurd amount of artificial flavorings and soy milk ("I just don't understand why no one carries almond milk," she complained pitifully, as if I could use my barista magic to contact the great Almond Cow and beg for a gift of it's precious milk).
As she walked out the door, I realized that in her overly-large prada purse was a tiny, shivering chihuahua, which looked back at me mournfully as she flipped her hair back and pulled her Droid phone out of her pocket. I didn't realize that creatures could look like they were experiencing suicidal thoughts until that moment.
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Coffee Shop Thoughts
A cliche goal in life is to write and successfully publish a book. I've been tossing the idea around in my brain for quite some time now. It's not that I can't do it - I'm a talented and meticulous writer, and I love the art of words with a passion that's borderline unhealthy. I just haven't been able to put my finger on exactly what I want to write about.
I think I've figured it out. Coffee shops. Barista chronicles. I wouldn't want to focus on the business aspect at all - in fact, I think the focus on the dollar bills as opposed to the love of the product that typically starts any major chain is the reason that coffee is turning into a status-symbol commodity rather than, well, just coffee. I wouldn't even use the name of the coffee shops that I've been employed at, or the ones that I frequent. I think it'd be fascinating to just talk about the role a barista plays in a coffee shop - not so much the whole "taking pride in a great double shot of espresso," but more the customer relation aspect.
To put it bluntly: wouldn't a book about the nut jobs that frequent coffee shops be a good read? Bartenders can blame these people's actions on alcohol, waiters and waitresses can blame it on hunger - baristas can only blame it on the obscurity of human nature. Caffeine addiction doesn't even cover it with these people - you can lay more blame on the cycle of the moon than on that.
I would talk about some of the sweeter moments, and some of the absolutely incredible people that I've met along the way...but still, I can't help but feel like people would be more interested in the crazy aspect than anything. There's nothing like a book that makes you legitimately laugh out loud and thank your lucky stars that you have your sanity and an occupation that keeps you as far away from these people as possible.
I think I've figured it out. Coffee shops. Barista chronicles. I wouldn't want to focus on the business aspect at all - in fact, I think the focus on the dollar bills as opposed to the love of the product that typically starts any major chain is the reason that coffee is turning into a status-symbol commodity rather than, well, just coffee. I wouldn't even use the name of the coffee shops that I've been employed at, or the ones that I frequent. I think it'd be fascinating to just talk about the role a barista plays in a coffee shop - not so much the whole "taking pride in a great double shot of espresso," but more the customer relation aspect.
To put it bluntly: wouldn't a book about the nut jobs that frequent coffee shops be a good read? Bartenders can blame these people's actions on alcohol, waiters and waitresses can blame it on hunger - baristas can only blame it on the obscurity of human nature. Caffeine addiction doesn't even cover it with these people - you can lay more blame on the cycle of the moon than on that.
I would talk about some of the sweeter moments, and some of the absolutely incredible people that I've met along the way...but still, I can't help but feel like people would be more interested in the crazy aspect than anything. There's nothing like a book that makes you legitimately laugh out loud and thank your lucky stars that you have your sanity and an occupation that keeps you as far away from these people as possible.
Sunday, May 16, 2010
Turning-Point Anxiety
I can't remember if I've updated about this recently or not, but I'm officially moved in with Tim. We've been living together for quite some time now - I think since February. It's been a major adjustment for a lot of reasons (and, surprisingly, living with Tim has not been the most complicated part).
Coming home to an empty house at night legitimately scared me for quite some time. On an average night, I get home from work around 10:30-11:00 pm, whereas Tim doesn't get home until 1:30-2:00 am. The silence would make my ears ring. I'd quickly turn on the TV to whatever garbage is on at that time, just to have some background clatter to make it feel like the noisy environment that I had recently moved out of. If there were dishes, I'd wash them. If there was laundry, I'd fold it. If there was homework, I would find some other meticulous cleaning that needed to be done and eventually get to writing that paper. In any case, I kept myself busy, not just because it was my home now and I wanted it to look presentable, but also because I didn't want to sit down and think about how often I was home alone, and how I've never had to deal with being alone for more than an hour or two at a time. I couldn't tell you why it frightened me - it just did.
To add to the whole "it was my home now" bit, I had to adjust to that, too. It sure didn't feel like my home until quite recently - it was still "Tim's place." No family pictures around, none of my candles or keepsakes had been unpacked because there were no shelves to place them on, none of my books were out. That ratty, fluffy white blanket that I was so used to curling up in wasn't on the couch anymore. That squeaky floor board right in front of the fridge that I would intentionally step on repeatedly to annoy my brother was replaced with a squeak-free one. And there was that damned silence again - the baby wasn't babbling and throwing his plastic cups around, and mom & dad weren't screaming at the referees during the Wings game.
The fact that I was feeling all these incredibly bizarre and overly emotional sentiments worried me. This was supposed to be one of the most exciting moments of my life, and instead, I feel disheveled and completely out of my comfort zone.
But, not surprisingly, I adjusted over time. Each cupboard became progressively more organized, pictures of my family started going up, a magnetic notepad with Snoopy and Charlie Brown has been placed on the side of the fridge - all little things that say "Pam resides here." Not only that, but the new time with Tim has been FANTASTIC. Sure, there have been things that irk me, just like there would be with any roommate (why, oh WHY, should the can opener go in the sink after being used? AND WHY IN THE HELL ARE ALL OF THE GIRL SCOUT COOKIES GONE?!!) But, between cooking meals together, playing a few rounds of cards, or just chatting at the end of the day, I really couldn't be happier with where we are at.
Overall, I'm getting used to being a big girl - and I'm pretty darn content.
Coming home to an empty house at night legitimately scared me for quite some time. On an average night, I get home from work around 10:30-11:00 pm, whereas Tim doesn't get home until 1:30-2:00 am. The silence would make my ears ring. I'd quickly turn on the TV to whatever garbage is on at that time, just to have some background clatter to make it feel like the noisy environment that I had recently moved out of. If there were dishes, I'd wash them. If there was laundry, I'd fold it. If there was homework, I would find some other meticulous cleaning that needed to be done and eventually get to writing that paper. In any case, I kept myself busy, not just because it was my home now and I wanted it to look presentable, but also because I didn't want to sit down and think about how often I was home alone, and how I've never had to deal with being alone for more than an hour or two at a time. I couldn't tell you why it frightened me - it just did.
To add to the whole "it was my home now" bit, I had to adjust to that, too. It sure didn't feel like my home until quite recently - it was still "Tim's place." No family pictures around, none of my candles or keepsakes had been unpacked because there were no shelves to place them on, none of my books were out. That ratty, fluffy white blanket that I was so used to curling up in wasn't on the couch anymore. That squeaky floor board right in front of the fridge that I would intentionally step on repeatedly to annoy my brother was replaced with a squeak-free one. And there was that damned silence again - the baby wasn't babbling and throwing his plastic cups around, and mom & dad weren't screaming at the referees during the Wings game.
The fact that I was feeling all these incredibly bizarre and overly emotional sentiments worried me. This was supposed to be one of the most exciting moments of my life, and instead, I feel disheveled and completely out of my comfort zone.
But, not surprisingly, I adjusted over time. Each cupboard became progressively more organized, pictures of my family started going up, a magnetic notepad with Snoopy and Charlie Brown has been placed on the side of the fridge - all little things that say "Pam resides here." Not only that, but the new time with Tim has been FANTASTIC. Sure, there have been things that irk me, just like there would be with any roommate (why, oh WHY, should the can opener go in the sink after being used? AND WHY IN THE HELL ARE ALL OF THE GIRL SCOUT COOKIES GONE?!!) But, between cooking meals together, playing a few rounds of cards, or just chatting at the end of the day, I really couldn't be happier with where we are at.
Overall, I'm getting used to being a big girl - and I'm pretty darn content.
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
Now what?
I've always struggled with the concept of free time, because ever since I was a kid, I've always been involved in multiple organizations at the same time - dance classes, soccer, and so on. That never changed as I got older - it only got "worse." Multiple jobs, long hours, classes, extra school-related things on top of classes, student organizations, church involvement...you name it, I've participated in it.
Now, here I am. It's the beginning of what's sure to be a beautiful summer. No classes, work is only claiming 20-30 hours of my week...And here's the real kicker - I'm living on my own. Every detail of my time and energy is controlled by me, myself, and I. Now, I don't have any money to speak of, so I can't exactly go out and splurge on home decorating stuff, knitting/sewing materials, music, etc. But I still have all the free time in the world.
...I don't know what to do with myself.
Now, here I am. It's the beginning of what's sure to be a beautiful summer. No classes, work is only claiming 20-30 hours of my week...And here's the real kicker - I'm living on my own. Every detail of my time and energy is controlled by me, myself, and I. Now, I don't have any money to speak of, so I can't exactly go out and splurge on home decorating stuff, knitting/sewing materials, music, etc. But I still have all the free time in the world.
...I don't know what to do with myself.
Monday, May 3, 2010
Graduation
Yeah, yeah, I know. I suck at posting. I'm really, legitimately hoping that changes this summer.
So four years have come and gone, and I'm officially an OU alumni as of May 1st, 2010. Granted, I'm just going right back, so this is more of a massive speed-bump than anything, but I still can't fully wrap my head around the fact that I'm finished. I didn't get the grades that I wanted, and maybe I didn't do everything that I wanted to in the past four years - but I got through it, and I couldn't be more proud of myself.
For those of you who couldn't be at the graduation mass at SJF this past Sunday (*cough*Manda*cough*), I figured I would post my reflection here in case you were interested in reading it.
"Let me just say for starters, and I’m sure every graduate here can agree with me - I never thought I’d get to the point where I’d actually be wearing this cap & gown.
For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Pam Hester and I’m officially an OU alumni with a degree in Political Science & English (which basically means I’m OK with the idea of peanut butter & jelly at least twice a day for the next five-ish years). Because I’m passionate about American politics, I’ll often find myself getting into in-depth discussions about current events with people, particularly when it comes to the area of social justice, and almost every person that I’ve ever talked to in this sense will always ask “Why in the world are you a political science major?” It’s as if I’ve willingly accepted some sort of disease that will inevitably make me cantankerous, irrationally partisan, and greedy beyond all reason.
The truth is, getting this degree hasn’t just helped me become a more informed citizen, or a well-rounded student that’s ready to take on the master’s level courses in the fall. There’s a strong Christian calling for me within the social sciences. In the Gospel today, we hear Jesus give us that beautiful new commandment - the one that is as essential to being a Christian as believing in the death and resurrection of our Lord and Savior: “As I have loved you, so you also should love one another. This is how all will know that you are my disciples.” It’s agape - that unconditional and sacred love that should know no boundaries, have no expectations, and come as naturally as a smile.
There are so many examples of modern day Christian love emanating through what seems like nothing but depressing times, but sometimes it’s the smallest things that strike your heart so strongly that you feel as if Jesus himself is standing right next to you. A few years ago, I was working at a local bookstore at Christmastime (which seems like the strangest setting for an example of agape, considering any retail environment during the holiday season is just plain terrifying, but stick with me). We were in the middle of a massive rush, and I had a woman come up to the register with two impatient children, a huge pile of expensive items, and an expired coupon. Needless to say, she wasn’t pleasant. We completed her transaction, and she moved over a few feet to wrestle her kids into their jackets before they went out in the cold. Right after her, I had a boy come up to the register, and he was mentally impaired. He had a Magic Tree House book that he wanted to buy, and he handed me a five dollar bill. The problem is, those books typically run about $15. I tried to explain to him that he didn’t have enough money, but I couldn’t get him to understand, and I was at a complete loss as to what to do (furthermore, I couldn’t reach into my own pocket - that’s just asking for a write-up). The woman that I had just helped earlier was still working with her kids when she looked up and saw what was going on. Despite the fact that she was frantic, she came over and said quietly “Let me pay for the book.” She kept it subtle - she didn’t expect any thanks from the boy or any acknowledgment from anyone. She just paid for it, smiled, scooped up her antsy children and merchandise, and walked out the door. That’s agape.
Another smaller example of this kind of love took place when I was actually living on campus at OU. During the winter months, I had tendonitis in my foot, so I was on crutches. Now, for those of you who have never been on OU’s campus, let me just sum up what it’s like to get to and from class - there’s no straight path to any, ANY of the buildings, and there’s always patches of ice lurking the in the shadows that catch you off guard every time. Furthermore, there’s no escape from the wind in the heart of campus - you’re caught in some sort of awful Winter Wonderland . So, to get to and from classes on crutches with a backpack full of books was insanely difficult, not to mention painful, and for whatever reason I wasn’t allowed to have a temporary handicapped parking pass. On one particularly windy and cold day, I was trying to get to one of the buildings, and I actually had to stop because every muscle in my body was aching. A person saw me, and he came up and offered to carry my books, and when he saw how much pain I was in he even offered to carry me. I told him that wouldn’t be necessary, but I definitely took him up on the offer to carry my stuff. What struck me the most about all of this was that after he helped me get to class and he took off to go to his, he didn’t ask me for my number of anything like that - he just did what he did to be genuinely kind. It’s been four years, and I still remember his kindness.
So, to link this all back to my calling to be active in the social science realm - I feel that the Christian love that Jesus expects of us includes this sort of beauty, but he also expects us to go beyond the temporary fixes that we are all more than willing to give. Feeding the hungry, sheltering the homeless - it’s definitely a way to express our love, and it’s something that this community has embraced. But Jesus calls us to something deeper and much more challenging than the application of a band-aid. Feed the hungry - absolutely. But begin to ask the question as to why there’s hunger in the first place. Question why those with food are a minority, and while there are so many people who go hungry every night, the statistics of obesity are becoming even more and more staggering. Shelter the homeless - without a doubt. But with so many families on the brink of losing everything they have, the solution needs to go beyond providing a bed for an evening and it should focus on how to prevent this type of collapse in the future.
This is what I’m called to. For me, political science isn’t just the realm of crooked individuals with contradictory voting records and even worse catch phrases. It’s the area of study where I know that I can be an advocate for social justice. I know that in understanding the intricacies of the American political process, and learning more about the non-profit sector in my studies in the fall, I can begin to truly work towards that mission of love that Jesus has put forth for us. And it’s not just the political science realm that’s like that - that’s just my calling. Every graduate here has identified his or her strengths and weaknesses and found something that they’re passionate about. That passion in combination with the new commandment can be harnessed into something powerful and beautiful if we let it. It’s a way to use our gifts and talents that were bestowed on us from the moment of conception to bring this planet one step closer to the Kingdom of God.
I’m sure every graduate here can say that they have no idea what the future holds for them, especially in these uncertain times, and that’s terrifying and often pretty discouraging. But I’m confident in the fact that if we take what we’ve learned over the past four or more years and combine it with that unconditional love for our neighbor as Jesus expects of us, we’ll be living a life that far exceeds anything we imagined. It’ll be the life that God had envisioned for us before we even knew how to dream."
Thank you all for your love and support the past four years. I couldn't have done it without you.
So four years have come and gone, and I'm officially an OU alumni as of May 1st, 2010. Granted, I'm just going right back, so this is more of a massive speed-bump than anything, but I still can't fully wrap my head around the fact that I'm finished. I didn't get the grades that I wanted, and maybe I didn't do everything that I wanted to in the past four years - but I got through it, and I couldn't be more proud of myself.
For those of you who couldn't be at the graduation mass at SJF this past Sunday (*cough*Manda*cough*), I figured I would post my reflection here in case you were interested in reading it.
"Let me just say for starters, and I’m sure every graduate here can agree with me - I never thought I’d get to the point where I’d actually be wearing this cap & gown.
For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Pam Hester and I’m officially an OU alumni with a degree in Political Science & English (which basically means I’m OK with the idea of peanut butter & jelly at least twice a day for the next five-ish years). Because I’m passionate about American politics, I’ll often find myself getting into in-depth discussions about current events with people, particularly when it comes to the area of social justice, and almost every person that I’ve ever talked to in this sense will always ask “Why in the world are you a political science major?” It’s as if I’ve willingly accepted some sort of disease that will inevitably make me cantankerous, irrationally partisan, and greedy beyond all reason.
The truth is, getting this degree hasn’t just helped me become a more informed citizen, or a well-rounded student that’s ready to take on the master’s level courses in the fall. There’s a strong Christian calling for me within the social sciences. In the Gospel today, we hear Jesus give us that beautiful new commandment - the one that is as essential to being a Christian as believing in the death and resurrection of our Lord and Savior: “As I have loved you, so you also should love one another. This is how all will know that you are my disciples.” It’s agape - that unconditional and sacred love that should know no boundaries, have no expectations, and come as naturally as a smile.
There are so many examples of modern day Christian love emanating through what seems like nothing but depressing times, but sometimes it’s the smallest things that strike your heart so strongly that you feel as if Jesus himself is standing right next to you. A few years ago, I was working at a local bookstore at Christmastime (which seems like the strangest setting for an example of agape, considering any retail environment during the holiday season is just plain terrifying, but stick with me). We were in the middle of a massive rush, and I had a woman come up to the register with two impatient children, a huge pile of expensive items, and an expired coupon. Needless to say, she wasn’t pleasant. We completed her transaction, and she moved over a few feet to wrestle her kids into their jackets before they went out in the cold. Right after her, I had a boy come up to the register, and he was mentally impaired. He had a Magic Tree House book that he wanted to buy, and he handed me a five dollar bill. The problem is, those books typically run about $15. I tried to explain to him that he didn’t have enough money, but I couldn’t get him to understand, and I was at a complete loss as to what to do (furthermore, I couldn’t reach into my own pocket - that’s just asking for a write-up). The woman that I had just helped earlier was still working with her kids when she looked up and saw what was going on. Despite the fact that she was frantic, she came over and said quietly “Let me pay for the book.” She kept it subtle - she didn’t expect any thanks from the boy or any acknowledgment from anyone. She just paid for it, smiled, scooped up her antsy children and merchandise, and walked out the door. That’s agape.
Another smaller example of this kind of love took place when I was actually living on campus at OU. During the winter months, I had tendonitis in my foot, so I was on crutches. Now, for those of you who have never been on OU’s campus, let me just sum up what it’s like to get to and from class - there’s no straight path to any, ANY of the buildings, and there’s always patches of ice lurking the in the shadows that catch you off guard every time. Furthermore, there’s no escape from the wind in the heart of campus - you’re caught in some sort of awful Winter Wonderland . So, to get to and from classes on crutches with a backpack full of books was insanely difficult, not to mention painful, and for whatever reason I wasn’t allowed to have a temporary handicapped parking pass. On one particularly windy and cold day, I was trying to get to one of the buildings, and I actually had to stop because every muscle in my body was aching. A person saw me, and he came up and offered to carry my books, and when he saw how much pain I was in he even offered to carry me. I told him that wouldn’t be necessary, but I definitely took him up on the offer to carry my stuff. What struck me the most about all of this was that after he helped me get to class and he took off to go to his, he didn’t ask me for my number of anything like that - he just did what he did to be genuinely kind. It’s been four years, and I still remember his kindness.
So, to link this all back to my calling to be active in the social science realm - I feel that the Christian love that Jesus expects of us includes this sort of beauty, but he also expects us to go beyond the temporary fixes that we are all more than willing to give. Feeding the hungry, sheltering the homeless - it’s definitely a way to express our love, and it’s something that this community has embraced. But Jesus calls us to something deeper and much more challenging than the application of a band-aid. Feed the hungry - absolutely. But begin to ask the question as to why there’s hunger in the first place. Question why those with food are a minority, and while there are so many people who go hungry every night, the statistics of obesity are becoming even more and more staggering. Shelter the homeless - without a doubt. But with so many families on the brink of losing everything they have, the solution needs to go beyond providing a bed for an evening and it should focus on how to prevent this type of collapse in the future.
This is what I’m called to. For me, political science isn’t just the realm of crooked individuals with contradictory voting records and even worse catch phrases. It’s the area of study where I know that I can be an advocate for social justice. I know that in understanding the intricacies of the American political process, and learning more about the non-profit sector in my studies in the fall, I can begin to truly work towards that mission of love that Jesus has put forth for us. And it’s not just the political science realm that’s like that - that’s just my calling. Every graduate here has identified his or her strengths and weaknesses and found something that they’re passionate about. That passion in combination with the new commandment can be harnessed into something powerful and beautiful if we let it. It’s a way to use our gifts and talents that were bestowed on us from the moment of conception to bring this planet one step closer to the Kingdom of God.
I’m sure every graduate here can say that they have no idea what the future holds for them, especially in these uncertain times, and that’s terrifying and often pretty discouraging. But I’m confident in the fact that if we take what we’ve learned over the past four or more years and combine it with that unconditional love for our neighbor as Jesus expects of us, we’ll be living a life that far exceeds anything we imagined. It’ll be the life that God had envisioned for us before we even knew how to dream."
Thank you all for your love and support the past four years. I couldn't have done it without you.
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Halloween 09
Hellllooooo out there. I'm back.
We received our infamous Party City catalog today, with all their splendid costume options for this season. As always, I immediately flipped it open and started looking through to see if they had any new and/or cute costumes to choose from (otherwise I'd have to resort to my age-old pirate costume...and Lord knows there are just too many pirates).
Now, every year, I'm always a little stunned at the amount of skin that some people are willing to show on Halloween, but the shock factor doesn't last too long, and I usually brush past the lingerie section of the ads to check out the Burger King or the Bacon&Eggs costume prices. But this year, I had to flip glossy page after glossy page to get to the incredibly small section at the back of the catalog that had a shred of humor and (dare I say it) decency.
Ladies and gentleman, the fashion industry has done it again. You have the traditional options such as "the Statue of Liberty" (Now complete with short skirt and garter belt!), and "story book sweetheart" (I'm pretty sure that making a young girl character into a sex icon is looked down upon in most cultures, although clearly it's alright in the American tradition).
But fear not! You have some new choices!
How about "the Eskimo cutie? A brown, low-cut dance leotard that flares out into a short skirt, complete with cotton fluff along the trim of the skirt, and a hood with two puffballs attached to the pull strings that will never be used. Throw on your favorite pair of white uggs that your daddy bought you to make the costume complete. (Newsflash: Eskimos don't wear those kinds of clothes outdoors. Only desperate girls in Michigan do.)
Or you can be "the Tribal Princess"! With feathers from some unknown bird that certainly never wandered the plains of this great land, lots of cleavage, and some fringe that (if you're lucky) will cover your cheeks, you'll look identical to Chief Slap-A-Hoe's wife.
Here's my point: There's no use in dressing like this on Halloween. If you want to get adventurous and show off your fun, kinky side, do it in the bedroom. Resorting to these kinds of costumes out in public only proves that you lack self-respect, self-worth, and creativity. Besides, you should leave some of those features that you prize most about yourself hidden (or only hinted at), thus leaving it up to the imagination of those who are interested in you - that makes you more desirable than throwing it all out there for anyone and everyone.
Oh well. Maybe I'll resort to the Greek Goddess costume. Or maybe I'll just dress normally and wear a sign that says "Nudist On Strike." Anything's better than the Eskimo cutie.
We received our infamous Party City catalog today, with all their splendid costume options for this season. As always, I immediately flipped it open and started looking through to see if they had any new and/or cute costumes to choose from (otherwise I'd have to resort to my age-old pirate costume...and Lord knows there are just too many pirates).
Now, every year, I'm always a little stunned at the amount of skin that some people are willing to show on Halloween, but the shock factor doesn't last too long, and I usually brush past the lingerie section of the ads to check out the Burger King or the Bacon&Eggs costume prices. But this year, I had to flip glossy page after glossy page to get to the incredibly small section at the back of the catalog that had a shred of humor and (dare I say it) decency.
Ladies and gentleman, the fashion industry has done it again. You have the traditional options such as "the Statue of Liberty" (Now complete with short skirt and garter belt!), and "story book sweetheart" (I'm pretty sure that making a young girl character into a sex icon is looked down upon in most cultures, although clearly it's alright in the American tradition).
But fear not! You have some new choices!
How about "the Eskimo cutie? A brown, low-cut dance leotard that flares out into a short skirt, complete with cotton fluff along the trim of the skirt, and a hood with two puffballs attached to the pull strings that will never be used. Throw on your favorite pair of white uggs that your daddy bought you to make the costume complete. (Newsflash: Eskimos don't wear those kinds of clothes outdoors. Only desperate girls in Michigan do.)
Or you can be "the Tribal Princess"! With feathers from some unknown bird that certainly never wandered the plains of this great land, lots of cleavage, and some fringe that (if you're lucky) will cover your cheeks, you'll look identical to Chief Slap-A-Hoe's wife.
Here's my point: There's no use in dressing like this on Halloween. If you want to get adventurous and show off your fun, kinky side, do it in the bedroom. Resorting to these kinds of costumes out in public only proves that you lack self-respect, self-worth, and creativity. Besides, you should leave some of those features that you prize most about yourself hidden (or only hinted at), thus leaving it up to the imagination of those who are interested in you - that makes you more desirable than throwing it all out there for anyone and everyone.
Oh well. Maybe I'll resort to the Greek Goddess costume. Or maybe I'll just dress normally and wear a sign that says "Nudist On Strike." Anything's better than the Eskimo cutie.
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Hey there, Hollywood.
Alright, Hollywood, let's have a chat. You know about "Juno," right? Fantastic work there, my friends. Teenage pregnancy and all of it's cuteness. And how about that "Secret Life of an American Teenager" television series? You know, you really nailed it on the head with that one - that's EXACTLY what it's all about.
Now, the birth of a child is always something amazing. And that baby, in all of it's compactness and cuteness, is able to control your life in the blink of an eye, simply because that's all the time it takes for that love to consume every centimeter of your heart.
But there's more to it than that. Let me take a shot in the dark here and say that it's actually not all sunshine, roses, and puppy dogs with ferociously wagging tails.
Say! There's an idea for a movie! Ok, follow me on this one - how about we do a bit on teenage pregnancy from the perspective of the entire family? We'll still follow the mother and the child, of course, but wouldn't it be interesting to see whether or not the family is affected at all by the situation? I mean, who knows, maybe it's the most emotionally turbulent time for the various members?
Follow the mother and father of the teen. After fully raising children of their own and getting ready to spend the money they've saved for kid-free relaxation and retirement, they now have to assist in raising another child in all aspects. They feel responsible on all levels for both the teen and the new baby, and to take a step back and let things happen the way they would if she was in a typical single-mother situation is next to impossible.
Follow the siblings. Some may have the opportunity to move out, feeling as if they've abandoned the family in some senses while in other senses feeling relieved that there is a chance for them to continue life in the direction they initially chose. Others may not have that option, and must live feeling perpetually torn between helping the family as much as possible and trying to find their own path in life, with the end result being an overwhelming feeling of guilt and hopelessness no matter what choice is made.
And no matter what the circumstance, nobody allows themselves to truly feel any of these emotions or speak about them, because their love for the child is so strong that they would give anything to make sure that the baby receives whatever he or she needs. So they bury all of these justified attitudes deep, and let them fester and boil.
So what do you think, directors and producers? Do you think that this subject matter is surface-y enough to make a blockbuster hit for next year? Do you think some indie musicians would write some touching music to go along with it, warming the heart of every American viewer?
Yeah, I thought not. Maybe we should just let the truth take the back-burner to our fantasy versions of life. Besides, who wants to go to the movies to actually watch reality, right?
Now, the birth of a child is always something amazing. And that baby, in all of it's compactness and cuteness, is able to control your life in the blink of an eye, simply because that's all the time it takes for that love to consume every centimeter of your heart.
But there's more to it than that. Let me take a shot in the dark here and say that it's actually not all sunshine, roses, and puppy dogs with ferociously wagging tails.
Say! There's an idea for a movie! Ok, follow me on this one - how about we do a bit on teenage pregnancy from the perspective of the entire family? We'll still follow the mother and the child, of course, but wouldn't it be interesting to see whether or not the family is affected at all by the situation? I mean, who knows, maybe it's the most emotionally turbulent time for the various members?
Follow the mother and father of the teen. After fully raising children of their own and getting ready to spend the money they've saved for kid-free relaxation and retirement, they now have to assist in raising another child in all aspects. They feel responsible on all levels for both the teen and the new baby, and to take a step back and let things happen the way they would if she was in a typical single-mother situation is next to impossible.
Follow the siblings. Some may have the opportunity to move out, feeling as if they've abandoned the family in some senses while in other senses feeling relieved that there is a chance for them to continue life in the direction they initially chose. Others may not have that option, and must live feeling perpetually torn between helping the family as much as possible and trying to find their own path in life, with the end result being an overwhelming feeling of guilt and hopelessness no matter what choice is made.
And no matter what the circumstance, nobody allows themselves to truly feel any of these emotions or speak about them, because their love for the child is so strong that they would give anything to make sure that the baby receives whatever he or she needs. So they bury all of these justified attitudes deep, and let them fester and boil.
So what do you think, directors and producers? Do you think that this subject matter is surface-y enough to make a blockbuster hit for next year? Do you think some indie musicians would write some touching music to go along with it, warming the heart of every American viewer?
Yeah, I thought not. Maybe we should just let the truth take the back-burner to our fantasy versions of life. Besides, who wants to go to the movies to actually watch reality, right?
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